A look back in time

Last year around this time we were waist deep in prepartions for moving our lives across the planet. I remember lying awake at night going over and over all the scenarios in my head, from what to bring, to how the kids will adjust, to if I will really be able to do this whole thing. And here we are a year later – we made a home here and we not only survived the first year, but we did pretty damn well, if I may say so myself. The kids have adjusted, Craig’s job is going well & we have made a good number of friends. Looking back, I can’t believe what we went through to get here, and whenever I see this picture: 

BOS to LAX to MEL

 I shake my head with a smile and wonder HOW DID WE DO THAT???

Well we did it, and I can honestly say I am glad we did.

Mother Nature sure is punctual

Down here the seasons change on the first of the month – Spring starts September 1st. Apparently, Mother Nature is right on track with this because the weather has certainly changed for the better. Days of rain and cold wind have been replaced with blue skies and warm air. I’m not apt to pack the “winter” clothes away just yet, but I have no problem letting the boys wear short sleeves to school.

Today is September 3rd, and what a sight to see all sorts of people out on the beach (not on the beach as we think, but on the beach with dogs, etc, many more people than there has been the past few months.) I even saw a woman in shorts and a tank top (singlet) with her feet in the water. The playgrounds were filled with energized kids, and moms happy to be out in the fresh air. The overall feeling is that winter is OVER and the sun will be here to stay.

What’s funny to me though is that the winter, it isn’t so bad. But I guess it’s all relative.

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I made another friend, a mom of one of Cameron’s classmate, and wouldn’t ya know it – she’s not Australian, but Swedish. Will I ever make a GENUINE Australian friend? Or is this the way it is for most people living in big cities? I’d be interested to know if the Sydney expats have many Aussie friends?

Almost a year later and I’m still confused

You would think that I would have the hang of things by now. But no. Today is the last day of winter, it is August 31st. I always thought there was some sort of winter solstice or something. I don’t know but I did not think it was the last day of the month. Either way, I’m psyched about the winter being over, even if it wasn’t a real winter in my humble opinion. Oh and this Sunday? It’s Father’s Day. We didn’t celebrate the American Father’s Day (sometime in June) so we will do it this weekend. It just doesn’t seem right.

Today I was asked by a friend if I had a waistcoat she could borrow. I had to ask her at least 4 times “what?” I still don’t know what she was referring to – a jacket? a dress? an apron? I really have no clue, and I don’t feel like googling it. I’ll just stick with not knowing.

When I drop off Cameron at school, I park along the curb. This morning I went to get into the left side of the car, it just seems so natural to me, being parallel parked getting into the driver’s seat from the sidewalk. But no – I always have to go into the street to get in the driver’s side. You would think I would get used to this by now.

More writing, elsewhere…

I submitted my first article to an online expat newsletter and it got published! Check it out here EXPAT FOCUS . I based it off of this post since this is something I continue to struggle with often. I am sure it applies to anyone, to just enjoy the here and now. We all need to stop sometimes, look around and just be thankful for the good in our lives. We all have shit to deal with, we all have struggles, but there has to be good as well. We get stuck in the day to day routines, sometimes just going through the motions of our day, without realizing the small things.

Even though my kids fight over toys, push each other out of the way to be the first to press the elevator button, and seem to press each others buttons all day long – every time we drop Jake off at school, they go through their usual goodbyes of a high five, a hug, and a kiss. It is the sweetest thing ever and it shows me that they really do love each other. Recently at the playground some older boys were not be nice to Jake and Cameron walked over to the them, got in front of Jake and said “That’s my brother Jake”, like he was sticking up for him. It was great to see him protective of him, and I only hope they continue to be that way. It’s these little things that can easily slip by, if I don’t really pay attention.

The mind of a 4 3/4 year old

Oh the questions! While driving past a cemetery the other day, Cameron said “Mom, look! A stone garden!” (that is what I had told him it was about a year ago in order to buy myself some time.) Then he went on with questions about why it is a stone garden, what is it for, etc etc. I said, “Do you really want to know what’s in there? Are you ready for this?” he replied “Yea.” I told  him in the simplest terms about what was really in this so-called stone garden and his reply was “So mom, you’re going to turn to a stone when you die?”

In the car yesterday, out of the blue, I caught a glimpse of his face in the rear view mirror and he looked sad. I asked him “What’s wrong sweetie?” He continued to look out the window and said “I wanna go back to Massachusetts.” I answered him “We are going to go back for a visit right after your birthday, won’t that be great?” Still with sadness in his voice, he told me, “I don’t want to go for a visit, I want to live there. I miss my friends.”

I went on about how I miss everyone too, and about the positive aspects of living in Australia (the beach! all your new friends! the kangaroos! I might have even thrown in fairy bread as a selling point.) Then he started in about missing snow and how he wants it to snow in Australia. Poor guy, he  just wants to make a snowman and hang with his friends in New England.

I am pretty sure this is all normal. But I figure that after living here for just about a year he would feel like this was home and kind of “forget” about our previous life, but that isn’t so. Thankfully we have less than 4 months left until our first visit back home.

Family vacation

40 some odd pictures of smiling faces. All different combinations of people in the family. I assumed the beautiful silver haired woman was the grandmother and my friend, who’s pictures I was viewing on Facebook, was her daughter. Shot after shot of kids water tubing, playing along the bank of the lake or maybe it was a river? Maybe they went to this same spot every August, each year the group growing with marriages and births. I don’t know this family at all, and this particular friend is more of an acquaintance, but someone I like and know is a fun person to be around. While looking at these photos, I could see how much fun they were having. And it wasn’t just smiling for the camera, there were candid’s and I swear it looked like a scene out of a movie -you could tell these people actually liked each other and had a good time when they all got together.  I found myself actually paying attention to each photo of these complete strangers. There are so many “family vacation” photos posted on Facebook that you kind of just breeze through, because you have no idea whose these people are (you know you do it too!)

And isn’t this what we all look forward to? When it comes down to it, the yearly vacation – whether it be a cruise, a ski house, or at a cabin by the lake, can sometimes be the highlight of the year.  We plan for it, schedule time off from work, agonize over what to pack, stress about if there will be enough room for everyone, take 250 photos, and complain about the usual family annoyances. But it is what we talk about again over Thanksgiving dinner, and look forward to again next year. Spending time with those people we happen to be related to, the people we trust and love even though they drive us crazy.

**

On a totally unrelated subject, I discovered Fairy Bread at a kids birthday party today. Oh My. Who knew that white bread, margarine & rainbow sprinkles could be so heavenly?

Magnets

I am convinced that we all come equipped with internal magnets – we attract people that are like us, and vice versa. I haven’t figured it all out; I can work out the details later.

Today, in a room full of Aussies, I was partnered in boxing class with my new friend who originally hails from the Big Apple. Not that she will ever read this, but for privacy sake, I’ll refer to her as Christine. To be fair, I was introduced to her awhile ago by one of Craig’s co-worker’s wives but for some reason it took us awhile to become friends. Christine is married to an Australian and they had their son here 4 years ago. She has been a great source of information, but more-so; a great source of comfort. She has the thickest New Yawk accent (love it!) and it just reminds me of my mom & her side of the family (yes my mom has lived outside of New York for over 30 years and still has the famous accent, it’s just in her blood!)

Last weekend we were invited over to Christine’s house for dinner, with another Australian couple – it was our first time with Aussie’s that weren’t coworkers of Craig’s! (alright, alright I know we have been here for 11 months, it took awhile!) We had such a good time, it was nice to spend time with a fellow American, and to also get to know some Australians. Not to mention, all of us have boys – so there were 5 of them running around having a ball.

Back to boxing class this morning: there we are, in this room full of Aussies wearing “Lonsdale”, “Bella Bustere”, “LeLuu” and all sorts of brands I never heard of, and punching my pad-covered hands is Christine - decked out in a GAP baseball hat and NIKE t-shirt. I had to laugh to myself, how ironic is this? I wasn’t self-conscious while counting, saying “thirteen, fourteen” instead of “thirdeen, fourdeen” or holding back a joke for fear of it being misunderstood.

We carry this magnet around in our bodies, sometimes it attracts people in our lives that we need, someone to make us smile and feel not so alone in this big ol’ world.

Yet another list

Things I still miss about America: (besides the obvious family & friends)

Tv shows! I keep hearing all about Big Brother, oh how I wish I could be in on the drama…And the fact that the episodes of The Young & the Restless are from over 6 months ago, I just realized it when they were celebrating Valentine’s Day…RECENT episodes of anything…

The deli counter at the grocery store.

Drive-thru ATM machines.

Old Navy. The Gap. Children’s Place. The Wrentham Outlets. Victoria’s Secret. The real Target, heck even Wal-mart.

Water with ice.

Normal parking lots. Without cement pillars.

Bed Bath & Beyond.

Pay-at-the-pump Gas Stations.

Wheat Thins.

The concept of coupons.

Things I don’t miss about America: 

High Fructose Corn Syrup.

Constant reports of gun violence.

I can’t think of anything else.

Fast forward 1 or 2 years:

–Insert list of Things I miss about Australia here–

Really, it’s the little things.

Costco opened its first store in Australia today. In Melbourne. The first store in the entire country, and it is a ten minute drive for us. Now you might not think this is a big deal, I wouldn’t either if I still lived in the US, not having a clue at how much one can savor the smell of Bounce fabric sheets, or the sight of the word Kirkland. You see, living here for the past 11 months, all the things at the store look strange. Even if it is the same brand as back home, it just looks different, the packaging, the weight is in grams, etc. Rice Krispies are Rice Bubbles here. I know, it is not a big deal. But when I stepped foot in that store today, it just felt like I was back home in Massachusetts and was shopping at my normal Costco (although I frequented BJ’s more since it was closer, but it’s pretty much the same thing.) To see the familiar jugs of Kirkland nuts, snacks and even the 96 rolls of paper towels, it just was so comforting. When we caught sight of bagels in the bakery section, we all kissed the bag. Yes we did. I didn’t really buy too much, it was just nice to peruse the aisles and see what they had. It was a riot to see the big jar of Vegemite amongst the peanut butter and Nutella, something you would definitely not see at the Costco back home.

I noticed on the items that are not Australian (Bounce fabric softener for example, they don’t see any sort of fabic sheets, they just don’t use it) there is a sticker over the back with the importers information. And the big container of grapes I bought? Straight from the good ol’ US of A! They have grapes here so I was confused by why they shipped them from America, but after tasting one, I realized how different they taste! Who would have thought that??

Next up: they are opening a store next yeat in Sydney, the next year in Brisbane and supposedly the next year they are opening 5 or 6 more in the Melbourne area. I hope the Aussies take to this type of bulk shopping!

** Edited to add: NO they do not carry our beloved Pepperidge Farm Goldfish, I am so sad about this. BUT they have normal shopping carts that only the front 2 wheels move – I think I was most excited by this, I couldn’t get over how easy they were to maneuver! **

Full Circle

Today was a day like any other and it dawned on me that tomorrow is our “anniversary” of moving here. 11 months to be exact (not that I am counting, but I constantly get asked by people how long we have lived here, so I always know.) And today I met 2 “newbies” to the country. One woman just moved here last month from France, with 2 kids and a third on the way. She was buying a travel high chair I had listed online. She reminded me of myself, just 10 months ago, trying to get everything I needed, feeling so out of my comfort zone, but it must be harder for her to speak another language. She was sweet and I stopped myself from offering to befriend her, I always want to help people, but for some reason I just let her be, to find her own way.

Then when I was picking up Jake from school, one of the “casual” teachers (they fill-in any class that is short a teacher) she must have heard me talking and her eyes lit up as she said “Are you from America?” (See, I’m not the only one who says “America” vs “the States”) So we immediately got to talking, she has only been here for 3 months, this also reminded me of that feeling of finding my way and feeling like such a stranger in a strangeland. Which brings me to my point: I do not feel like a stranger much any more. Yes there are times I don’t understand a certain word but I really feel comfortable here, we have a great routine, and everything just feels normal.

Next month we will celebrate our 1 year anniversary down under: a year full of change, adaptation, confusion, frustration, adventure & of stepping outside of our comfort zone, to find that taking a chance and doing something that sounds totally crazy - was so worth it.